Aug-Dog Turns 2
Birthday Party
2-18-07

Augie is 2 today.

**insert sappy mom nostalgia here... it's all true**

We had a very Aug-centric day. Play at the Mall indoor playground with Tamsen, then to Bounce, then Red Robin for icecream and french fries... in that order.

Beck got some tastes of ice cream too. He may never be the same.

Party with our family and our little buddies to come on Sunday, but this was a really fun Cook-day. I felt so thankful and happy to celebrate our little man. What a joy these 2 years have been.

Weekend trip to Cheyenne

Feb 2007

What I love about being a mom lately

is having a mom.

I really think I can relate to my mom as I pass through each of these stages with the boys. Not only that, it brings me closer to understanding how God loves us like children so completely

desperately

that's how I love my boys, desperately.

Do you know when joy aches? It hurts my heart to love my sons. In a beautiful and over full way- like I can't contain or appreciate the gift.

The other day Augie took over an hour to lay down and get serious about nap. I was so angry and frustrated. I (totally out of anger) gave him a smack on the leg. Then I cried. He cried, but it didn't hurt him- he cried because he was frustrated and I was mean. I am not always anti-spanking, although Jeff and I don't as a rule, I am anti spanking out of anger.

I cried, and asked him to forgive me, and told him that I would mess up a lot as a parent and he would have to forgive me a lot. This made me think of my mom. How I know that she probably went through this same thing (a lot with me- I am the girl Augie) and felt bad, and knew that she was the grown up and should act like the grown up, but didn't always. I bet my mom handled it better. I think she is more patient than me.

My solace lies in the fact that I don't hate my mom because she probably gave me swats to stay in bed. I don't remember, but if I did I wouldn't think she was a bad or mean mom. And only now, as a mom, I know why she would do some of the things she did.

Yesterday, when mom and dad took me and the boys to lunch, and Augie was saying the alphabet (which he loves to say), my mom was praising me for working hard with Augie to get there. I don't think she knows, but mom's praise is still the most coveted, the most meaningful... it made lots of hard hours of work feel so worth it. The only better reward is the fact that Aug is talking more.

I wonder if she thinks about her mom, and what that praise meant, and that is part of what compels her to take care of me in that way.

I love my mom, knowing now what it takes, but never being able to know all that it takes. I suppose the closest we humans can get to truly relating to the divine is to parent. The heartache and joy and desperate love.

Oh, and I know my mom will read this, but I wouldn't have written it any differently even if she didn't.

Augie knows how to climb out of his crib (side note, I am so sleepy right now that initially spelled climb with a "k") So we took the wall off... but where is our sleepy man?

Oh, under the futon in his room or,

half escaped!

I want to get a good photo of Augie kissing Becket, but even with several attempts this is all I could capture

They key to happiness with 2 babies?

Multitasking!

The boys are starting to play together! Aug brings Beck toys a lot... and then takes them away, but it's a start.

Oh, and if you are thinking that this last picture ends with Becket getting a kick to the head

it does.

Becket often helps daddy edit his book.

He is a tough but fair task master

Luckily his harsh critiques are blurred with drool before they hurt Jeff's feelings.